Not Just Anybody
by HalfwayDecentFanfiction
Summary: AU. Bolin is the illegitimate son of a Fire Nation general and Azula's consort. Azula thinks about her life and what Bolin means to her. Warnings: Mentions of noncon (not with Bolin), unhealthy/abusive relationship. Based on the song Help! by the Beatles. Please review this! I don't care WHAT you write I just want to know that people are actually reading it!


_Help, I need somebody_

_Help, not just anybody_

_Help, you know I need someone, help_

_When I was younger, so much younger than today_

_I never needed anybody's help in any way_

_But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured_

_Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors_

The room was black, the sumptuous sheets red. The sun was rising in the window, casting a pale pink light on Azula, who lay naked and clutching the blanket around her body, her black eyes fixed on a certain point on the ceiling. Her face was expressionless and cold, betraying none of the red-hot emotions that smoldered within.

She cast a quick, casual glance towards Bolin. The sun's rays played across his toned body like careless fingers. The glare from the sun seemed to cause him discomfort, because he groaned and rolled over onto his stomach.

Azula had several consorts, of course, but Bolin was by far her favorite. He was the bastard son of a general who had been stationed in the Earth Kingdom. As a reward for her accomplishments in the war, she had been given a position at court, and the Firelord had turned a blind eye to her second child. Bolin had grown up in the Firelord's court, but Azula had rarely seen him. She hadn't been allowed to associate with such riffraff.

As Azula quickly learned, being the Princess of the Fire Nation meant she could bring any man she wanted to her bed. Everyone knew the consequences of refusal. Bolin was different. The fool was willing, even excited, as if what they had was a real relationship, instead of a quiet, secret service he performed in the dead of night.

Which was why when Ty Lee and Mei betrayed her two days ago, Azula had rushed home with him and only him on her mind. She needed to feel that control over him, to prove to herself that she still had power over something. More importantly, she needed the illusion of closeness, the false intimacy she and Bolin shared. She needed to get rid of these desperate feelings that curled in her stomach and crawled into her head and ate at her like worms eating a corpse.

The sun rose higher in the sky. Next to her, Bolin groaned.

"I see you're awake," she said brusquely. He nodded and tried to nestle against her. She shoved him away. _Pathetic,_ she thought. _How could anyone be that desperate?_

"Do you know why I sent for you?" she said idly.

"You couldn't stay away from me?" Bolin mumbled.

"Don't be an idiot, Bolin," Azula said. She was quiet for a while. Then:

"My friends betrayed me," she said quietly.

"'Thas nice," Bolin said drowsily.

"And I don't care," she said. "I don't need those little twits to get what I want. They were assets, nothing more." Bolin nodded into his pillow.

"It still hurt," Azula said. "A little." Bolin didn't respond, and she hoped he hadn't heard her. What on earth was she thinking, betraying her weakness to some earthbender's soft-headed bastard? Not that he was clever enough to use it, of course. Then he threw his arm around her, trying to pull her close again. She pushed him away, but more gently this time.

"I have to go," Azula said finally. "I have a lot to accomplish today. See yourself out when you're finished lazing about in my bed. Oh, and last night was very satisfactory."

Bolin nodded. "Love you," he murmured. At once, every feeling she'd kept tamped down erupted. Not just about Mai and Ty Lee. About Zuko, her father, her uncle, her mother. Especially her mother. And for an instant, she felt that need she'd been suppressing, the need for someone who loved her unconditionally, who didn't think she was a monster. It was weak and pathetic and all-consuming, but she was able to squash it and regain control in a matter of seconds.

She sat up, grabbed Bolin by the hair, and pulled him sharply upwards.

"Don't say that to me," she said, softly and dangerously, almost hissing. "Not unless you mean it. Understand?" He nodded mutely, terror in his wide, naïve green eyes. She dropped him back onto the bed, rose, and put on her red silk robe.

"I did mean it," he said softly as she tied her sash.

"You think you did," she replied, but she felt something in her chest. Something warm.

Of course he thought he loved her. He didn't know her. That's the only way anyone could love her. Mother had known her, and Mother had feared and hated Azula more than anyone. That was the source of the strange affection she had for Bolin, she realized. He didn't see anything but what he wanted to see.

She didn't love him. She didn't believe she was capable. Most of the time, she didn't mind that. Love was pathetic, and made you weak. Mai could tell you that, rotting in her cell. Other times, though, it terrified her, because what made you human, if not love? What separated you from the wild, raging beast within?

She dismissed her fear. Bolin thought she was human. That was enough.

She rang for her servants and stepped out the door, then turned her head and looked back into the room.

"Bolin?" she said quietly.

"Huh?" he said, startled.

"Thank you," she said, and softly shut the door.

_And now my life has changed in oh so many ways_

_My independence seems to vanish in the haze_

_But every now and then I feel so insecure_

_I know that I just need you like I've never done before_

_Help me if you can, I'm feeling down_

_And I do appreciate you being round_

_Help me get my feet back on the ground_

_Won't you please, please help me_


End file.
